Mom blog: Because I Said So! WFMW: A very short parenting tip

wfmwsmall1-1.jpgIn the fall I took a parenting teens course, and took away from it a great deal of excellent info, new ways of thinking, and helpful sayings that should be (and likely are) on fridge doors across the country. This is the shortest parenting tip, and the one that I believe is most true and most useful (this with 37 child-parenting years of experience behind me, and many more to come):

Children spell love T-I-M-E.

All they want is your time and attention. Keep it in mind when you fob them off to the TV, or stack up their Saturdays with lessons, or take another useless call on the cell. Stretch out on the floor and play LEGO, make a bug jar, explain the intricacies of changing a light bulb, take your teen to coffee. Time may be money to grownups, but time is love to kids.

This quote is thanks to Dr. Anthony P. Witham. Smart man of few words.

Click for more Works for Me Wednesday tips of all kinds!

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7 Responses

  1. A very wise soul taught me this

    T.I.M.E=L.O.V.E.

    Thanks for this post.

  2. Amen! My husband and I both give each of our children alone/ quality with us. They love it and so do we. Sometimes it is as simple as helping daddy change the oil or helping mom plant things in the garden.

  3. So true… Spend time with your teenagers- it’s an investment that will pay off in the long run!

  4. I love this. It’s so important, because one day your kid will be 25 and moving out (like my oldest will be doing this week) and you’ll look back and wish you’d ignored the ringing phone and spent time playing with your kids. I will never regret one moment of ignoring ‘important’ stuff like chores in order to spend time with my four!
    When they were younger, they each got a “Saturday Morning with Mom.” That meant that once a month, one kid would get out of chores and spend the morning with me. We would run errands, hit garage sales, and have lunch together. It was so much fun!

  5. Great reminder!

  6. Great tip, thanks for the reminder…

  7. When my children were young we always had fun time… as they grew it was harder to keep that focus with school work etc…Our oldest son & I had communication problems that is what “birthed” the Friendly’s runs so that I could have strong, healthy communication with my daughter & younger son. Friendly’s is an ice cream/resturaunt here in the states don’t know if you have any there.

    This worked 2 ways … 1) if I felt the need to discuss any serious, “touchy” subject with her I would tell her we needed a Friendly’s run and off we’d go & sit & talk. 2) She could ask me for a Friendly’s run for anything at anytime … and she did often including her friends. The rules of our “runs” was that we were in public and on neutral ground so anything could be shared with no outburst and with no “advice” unless asked for. It was hard for me to sit & listen to some of the things the girls had to say without immediately jumping in with parental advice… but I somehow managed that & I would tell them I would not advise them unless they really wanted to know what I thought. They almost always wanted to know what I thought & often followed through on the advice given.
    I strongly advise parents of teens to make the extra effort to recognize that they need you more now then when they were younger. You need to have that safe connection with them so you can speak on equal ground with out over reacting to what they are saying & they need to respect what you have to say without blowing up (that’s why the in public on neutral ground worked so well for us no one running to their bedroom & slamming the door shut because they didn’t like what they heard)… this allowed my daughter the opportunity to act like an adult in the way she processed the conversation and responded to any advice given … it also allowed me to respect her as a growing young woman to hold my opinion to myself (like I would with any of my adult friends) until asked for my opinion/ advice.
    My youngest son & I had a few “runs” but mainly for the enjoyment of spending time together our discussions weren’t as serious as the ones my daughter & her friends would have. It was good, fun quality time together.

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